circle

peace: like "where the hell am i?" and "where am i going?"
that sort of peace. the peace where i realize the world isn't a massive orb but really a platform and a plateau and an everythingnothing inside out. the peace where you realize every thing is fucking insane and there's nothing you can do about it.
that part.
the part where you realize there's nothing you can do, but it's pretty as hell, and then you really really think about things and realize it's going to be okay anyway. peace, like when you sit back and think about how you can (and probably have) mess things up really bad, but are willing to fix them, too, with a little less sleep and a little more love.
peace like when he told me about his favorite musician and grabbed my leg and shouted along with beautiful lyrics, and wondering (and knowing) that that alone made it beautiful. peace in knowing things are true.
i've heard we can make our own heavens and we can make our own hells, and i heard that i am the decisive element, too. i've heard it pretty clearly like there's no other water to swim in, like there's no other song to dance to, but i guess i've been swimming and dancing elsewhere lately and maybe i should give these things a try.
i guess i've been putting too much faith in fate and less faith in my own actions.
i guess i believe i can't be enough.
hell, i'd be lying if i said i've found the holy grail and i've found peace, but i can see it and i know what it could be if i let it.
peace: like the beauty of just letting go, and i'm gonna let 'im fly.